I am sorry, this is really me just rambling - I need to get it all out and have no clue how to.
A few weeks ago, I decided I will be making my ileostomy permanent. I was really comfortable with this until about 2 days ago. I had a bit of a freak out, I don't feel like I have anyone to really talk about it with - as no one I personally know has a bag or really understands what I am going through.
I was 27 when I had my emergency surgery last October (just starting life really) and now with the next one lined up, I will be 29 shortly after I have the full removal. I am so tired, the last 6 years have been focused on being sick and now these 2 years where I focus on surgeries. While I watch everyone around me have babies and get married, I am worried about how my skin is doing, medication, and whether or not I will even be able to have kids once I am healed. I always thought I would have one kid before I was 30 - that doesn't look to be the case now.
What freaks me out the most with this is that most of my life, I will only know myself as having a bag - one thing my stoma nurse said really got me thinking. "You are lucky that you have a flat stomach - it makes putting your bag on so much easier and less leaks." Well, that is fine for now but what about if I get pregnant, gain weight, or when I am older - my body will be so different at that point, will I be able to handle it, will it be harder than it is now. The what-ifs just keep coming up.
I got to choose between permanent ostomy and j-pouch - I picked the ostomy because of all the research I read there is less of a chance of infertility with the ostomy.
Mostly, I think I am stressed because the wafer has been causing me issues on my skin and has been so itchy and annoying. I don't want that the rest of my life.
Why Join MeetAnOstoMate?
First off, this is a pretty cool site with 33,889 members. Get inside and you will see.
It's not all about ostomy. Everything is being discussed.
Many come here for advice or to give advice 🗣, others have found good friends 🤗, and there are also those who have found love 💓. Most of all, people are honest and truly care.
Privacy is very important - the website has many features that are only visible to members.
Create an account and you will be amazed.
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Hollister
Talking about having an ostomy can be uncomfortable for most people. Still, it's something you can't always avoid.
Learn about some strategies that can make it easier to talk about your stoma.
Learn about some strategies that can make it easier to talk about your stoma.
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Hollister
We conducted a survey to better understand the impact that living with an ostomy has on sleep.
Learn the results of our ostomy sleep survey.
Learn the results of our ostomy sleep survey.