A Free Spirit Up for Sale - A Poem by Sweede After Surgery

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sweede
Feb 28, 2009 11:36 pm

Hi folks, Here's a wee poem I wrote a few years ago, not long after my double ostomy surgery. I found it again a few weeks ago, so what the heck, I'm gonna post it up for you folks. I call it "A Free Spirit Up for Sale", hope you enjoy.



How can one become so broken
reduced to nothing but a token
of society.

Variety has been taken away
each day the same as the next day
a passenger on the road that was once my highway
"Party's over dude... catch ya later
we're cruising off now to chase our dreams it seems
on the flip side... spectator".

A child of despair unable to repair
the damage that's been done
a child on the run
disbelief
abusing drugs for relief.

"This non-conforming runaway
needs reforming right away
let's crush his soul for his own protection
allow his bowl to flow with rejection"
and resistance
for you failed to drown out the call
of the drums in the distance.

A free spirit up for sale
to any lover with a similar tale.

Past Member
Mar 01, 2009 2:24 pm


Let's not forget that life is dear

Just because we got no rear!!

We can still love and play

Thank you, God, for another day

I'll stand up straight, like a man

I'll show the world, oh yes I can

I will not whimper, never cry

If I fail, again I'll try

Life will test your very mettle

For second best I will not settle

I'll be the best that I can be

Others are watching, what will they see

Don't let them see that you'll give in

Remember always, who dares... wins!!
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sweede
Mar 01, 2009 3:39 pm

Equally impressive superhero, and very motivating also, so I guess it looks like we got a poetry slam going down. Yay, take it easy, dude.

Past Member
Mar 01, 2009 4:51 pm
thanks sweede, now that you and i have ours down... a challenge to the rest of our members..... lets see your best

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sounitha
Mar 02, 2009 4:19 am

Sweede,
That was a sweet poem. True & inspiring! Praise be to God.
I too had the same spirit inside me which made me stand up and show the world that I am not broken after my urostomy surgery at the age of 12.
Sounida

 

Getting Support in the Ostomy Community with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

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ximena
Mar 02, 2009 10:10 am
This is the translation I made of a poem I wrote a few months after getting my colostomy. My mother-tongue is French, so be indulgent with my (sometimes) halting and faulty English.

Here we go :



AN IMPOSTOR



On my belly the stoma

gently gurgles

going glug-glug.

I am alone and I enjoy

not being ashamed.

A few centimeters above

the navel my mother made me

I now have another opening on the world

related in some way or other

to the eyes and hands

of a surgeon

I know nothing about.



A flower on my stomach

born from the manure cooking inside.

Red

it sprouted on my skin

and it doesn't conceal

the kisses from its lips.

Fountain, walled-in spring, it splutters

and sometimes falls asleep at dawn.



I hate it I love it

il makes me different

maladjusted

it makes of me a fake

among the crowd :

seemingly alone, I have got company.

Secretely I wear

a red carnation

in the buttonhole of my belly.





And now the original French version of the same :



IMPOSTURE.



Sur mon ventre la stomie

régurgite doucement

faisant glou-glou

Je suis seule

momentanément délivrée de ma honte.
Quelques centimètres au-dessus

du nombril (fil rompu entre moi et ma mère)

j'ai maintenant une autre ouverture sur le monde

reliée d'une manière ou de l'autre

aux yeux et aux mains

d'un chirurgien

dont je ne sais rien.



Une fleur sur mon ventre

née de la déliquescence qui bouillonne au-dedans.

Rouge

elle a éclos sur ma peau

et ne dissimule pas le baiser de ses lèvres.

Fontaine murée elle gargouille dans la nuit

et s'endort parfois

sur les notes silencieuses de l'aurore.



Je l'aime je la hais.

Elle me rend différente

dépareillée.

elle fait de moi une tricheuse

au milieu de la foule.

Apparemment seule

j'ai de la compagnie :

je porte un  oeillet rouge

à la cicatrice de ma vie.





Jo.









Seede, I loved your poem.

Super-hero, yours is a plea for life and optimism.


sweede
Mar 02, 2009 12:39 pm

Wow!! That is an excellent poem, Ximena, very delicate. It made me smile and frown, and brought sorrow in the sweetest possible way. I really, really love it.
You have a real talent there (that only the French have, lol). x

And Southina, thanks for the comment. The drums are heard by us all; it only takes the courage to follow the sound. Some fear rejection if they dance to the beat, but they are our sounds and our beat also. The fear of rejection is in us all. If you keep dancing, others will follow, and the stigma of rejection is no more. x

ximena
Mar 02, 2009 12:52 pm

I, Sweede, thank you for your appreciation.

Well, I'm determined to keep dancing and listening to the drums!

Fear of rejection, yes, I guess you can't escape that altogether, but my way to overcome it is to think of myself first as an artist, a writer, a woman who likes to meet people, to travel, to enjoy life, and who, incidentally, wears a bag... and not as an ostomate who remains hidden in her lair like a wounded beast!

Jo.

eddie
Mar 02, 2009 8:40 pm

Hey Sweede, your message moved me; I have felt that also.
Eddie

sweede
Mar 02, 2009 8:56 pm

I imagine most of us have felt like that many times post-op, Eddie. Thanks for sharing your honesty.

eddie
Mar 02, 2009 9:33 pm

Thanks, honesty is my best and worst trait.
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You sound fairly open yourself; it takes self-honesty to write as you do, and you write well.
Eddie