Dealing with Colostomy Splashing at Home: Seeking Advice

i really need help my mother-in-law lives with my husband and i and she is the one with the colostomy(she has had for 15 years),she is only 67 and is other wise healthy (but lazy).my problem is the splashing thats she cares nothing about.every single day it is ALL over my bathroom,the walls,the floor,the toilet,the clothes hamper,i mean nothing in my bathroom is safe.i can't say anything about or i catch hell from my husband to the point of divorce if this doesn't change.

my question is: is this splashing normal? is there anything that can be done to stop it?

Hi Sherib......I've had a colostomy since this past Oct. and I've learned that when draining my pouch while standing close to the toilet drop a few pieces of toilet paper into the bowl and it alleviates a lot of the splashing.....

SP

It is NOT norma & it is not acceptable.

What possible excuse could there be for crapping all over someones bathroom?

It seems that she feels sorry for herself & wants attention.

Gee, sorry to hear that...but i think the same thing..It is not normal to 'let it rip everytime, if anything you try not to mess...seems there might be something bugging her..After 15 yrs...im thinking she knows exactly what she is doing...I dont know how ur handling it..I had a lady with a Urostomy stay with me for a week....she was almost the same...but with her...seems it was just no common sense and just lazy.Tell her the nursing home is looking real good..lol..sorry..Good luck with it..XX

yea she is lazy and sad as it is she milks it she has my husband wrapped around her little finger and she plays that to,its driving me crazy.and to top it all off she NEVER leaves the house (not even to the mailbox) so me and my husband have no live together anymore she has been living with us for 2 years now and i don't think i'm gonna hang around for many more,i'm afraid this is a battle i will never win.



thanks for the answers and thoughts it helps to have others tell me i'm not just being a b&%ch.



Shari

Getting Support in the Ostomy Community with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

Shari.....right to the point here....tell her and your husband to grow up.Carrying on like a spoilt brat that she is...I'd be telling her she wouldnt look to fancy being put over my knee..Maybe even leave the mess till your hubby can see first hand...there r ways around this....just think like her(sorry)Lol..Have as much as an attitude as her, show her who the boss is...go get her girl!!!!!!...Its your happiness at stake here..xx good luck

I agree with Tarababy!  And maybe she needs to get into therapy to deal with her anger.

At 67 I assume she is not an invalid and has mobility. When she empties her appliance ask her to kneel down on one knee and gently empty. This will avoid all the mess that you are getting.

Gee!!! I was going to give an answer...but think i better stay quite .....Well maybe a little....Sharib ur the one left cleaning up the mess and I feel sorry for u...How u have put up with this for so long ? I dont know... I think she is just acting up...cant have things all her way,unless of course she isnt a full quid-meaning senile or other..doesnt sound like it to me...and ur fair game...Seems u have given her a lot of patience which, i take my hat off to u.....but not working...I would be getting a bit tough with her by now....(its my way or the highway old girl ) But thats just me.....still wishing u the best of luck and hope things work out fast for u....chow for now..XXX..oh and no im not a cranky old fart who doesnt like older people...just believe in-treat people how u like to be treated & to get respect u have to earn it...not expect it...ta ta...lol

has anyone had experience with the bags that don't get emptied (single use) i was thinking maybe that might help my problem

Possibly your mother-in-law should use disposable bags.  Therefore, she wouldn't need to empty the bag.  I never heard of this before.  No need for the mess you are describing.  This is not worth losing your marriage so I hope your husband is taking a stand and talking to her.  Good luck and I hope things work out for you!!!

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Hey Sharib,

I only use the single use bags.  Personally, I can't imagine using anything else.  It's obviously more expensive but worth it to me.  I haven't had any problems or the kind of mess you are experiencing in the past 18 months I have had the colostomy.

I agree with the rest...stand your ground as your MIL's behaviour is not acceptable...ever!!!

Bill

Hey Sharib: I have had my ostomy for 48 years and NEVER had a problem like this. I sit on the potty just like anyone else and scoot back a little and lean forward to empty. Sounds to me like she is very inconsidarate of others that have to use the same bathroom and she knows that you will clean up after her.  I would hand her the cleaning supplies and ask her to please clean up when she is finished. I'll bet this mess would not happen in her own home. Since she seems to be playing your husband against you,  why don't you remove yourself from the problem by letting him clean up after her if she won't do it? This is not worth losing you marriage over--I'm sure there is a solution--I'm just sorry you are going thru this.

Hey Bill:  I'm with you on this one.  I too use the single bags.  Wouldn't use anything different.  Easy to dispose of and no mess.

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Hello  I've only just joined so this may be an old topic.  If you are still having problems why not try and show your husband this site and the remarks that have followed your initial query?  If he cares at all he should see you are being reasonable and trying to find an answer. Your mother-in-law however sounds a real tarter.  Hope by now you have things a bit easier