Life After Choosing a Permanent Colostomy: My Journey

I thought I'd write a post for newbies who might be apprehensive about their new life with a bag on the outside of their body. My story comes full circle.

I'm not a writer, so here goes...

I was 40 when my life hit a massive speed bump. I was walking into work and suddenly my bladder and bowels just opened up, like a floodgate. I found myself standing in the lobby crying and covered with filth. That was the beginning...

It took a month to figure out what was happening, but once we did, I had a decision to make. The nerves to my bladder and bowels were dead and would never work again. I was told to think about having two bags, one for urine and one for stool. I freaked out and put the brakes on fast...

I spent the next year in adult diapers and it was the worst year of my life. I became depressed and wouldn't go out. I hated myself and just knew everyone in the world would hate me too. I knew something had to change.

I decided to have bladder surgery to lift and lengthen, so I'd have more time to reach the bathroom, and once that was done, I had the surgery that changed my life!

I made the decision to have a permanent colostomy, something that I was afraid to do because it seemed so scary and let's face it, I was terrified.

That night before the surgery, I lay in bed thinking about all my fears. Would it show, would it smell, would it be in the way, could I still wear my regular clothes, could I take a shower, a bath, or still swim? I worried about what my diet would be and how I would do this!

The surgery went well and my home nurse was amazing; she built me up and made me realize that I had this. She left and I was on my own.

It's been thirteen years and having the ostomy surgery was the best decision that I've ever made. It gave me my life back. I can do all the things I did before my life hit that speed bump.

I only wish that I had done it sooner because the year I waited only brought me to a place that I never want to be again. What was I afraid of? I wear the same clothes, no one knows that I have the colostomy unless I tell them. It doesn't smell and my diet hasn't changed much. I can take a shower or bath and swim in my pool.

I'm a whole person again and my life is amazing.

If you're facing your own trials and tribulations with a new ostomy, please know it will change your life in a good way and if you're afraid like I was, hopefully, this helps you a little.

Thanks for giving me a platform to share and help others!

So pleased to hear how well you have come since the dreadful times you experienced, also going through the surgery of course. 

Yes you are a whole person again. Enjoy everything the future brings to you. 

Yep, the bag has made life easier now. I went from having to make a mad dash to the bathroom 20-30 times a day and hoping I’d make it to emptying this bag maybe 3 times a day on average pretty much whenever I want. 

Thanks for sharing your journey Mel.  You have gone through a lot, and experienced how low a person can feel, when things seem hopeless, and yet come out the other side the better for it.  Congratulations on making the adjustment to your new normal so well.  Not all ostomates do, so your post helps to serve as an inspiration to others.  My journey was a little different than yours, in that I had no choice about getting an ostomy because my bowel ruptured, and it was a life or death situation.  I had endured years of pain and discomfort due to chronic constipation, and yet had avoided all serious discussion of having a colostomy, due to fear of what my life would be like afterwards.  I've come to feel like you, that I wish I had done it sooner, because my life is so much better now.  I'm thankful for this little stoma every day.  

Terry

Very pleased that you found a positive way to live with the colostomy. I feel the same way about my ileostomy. I probably would have died without it. I wasn't living a life at all before it because I spent most of my time in the hospital or in bed at home. I have had a good life for almost the last 50 years with it. I feel very grateful and blessed that I have it.

Kind regards,

Connie

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