Humorous and Unexpected Stoma Reactions

Hi Everyone,




It's been about 3 yrs since I got my permanent colostomy and Barbie Butt.

Life has got a lot less painful since the operation. I've finally discovered what people are talking about when they say "Pain-Free"

Well, mostly anyways. But that's another story.





Let me set the scene for you. I'm 44 yrs old. I have a permanent colostomy - name of Tomi - and spinal injuries. I've had the Barbie Butt operation,

where they remove your rectum and stitch you up. I joke I'm the only person I know who can't talk out of their ass. Mine's been stitched up.

I've always had difficulty eating, have no appetite and what I do eat tastes like cardboard. I eat one meal a day and get by on that. Most days I have to really

force myself to eat what little I do. Food is a huge struggle and issue for me. I'm working on it but... let's say it's a work in progress.

For the last 5 yrs I've been able to cook or eat, but not both. I haven't had the energy. I have chronic fatigue syndrome as a consequence

of Ross River Fever. I have difficulty sleeping and a seriously hectic and stressful lifestyle.

I have tried to minimize my stress as best I can but there are some things I cannot remove from my life just yet.



So I go to the doctor complaining of difficulty sleeping and he prescribes Mirtazapine. Have any of you tried this gem with your stoma? It's entertaining.



For years I have had trouble sleeping. I take hours to get to sleep and then I wake up at the drop of a hat.

Finally, my doctor prescribed Mirtazapine. He warned me - you could gain weight on this pill. Well, given it's

taken me over 20 yrs to gain 20 kilos I said sign me up for this side effect! I want it, I want it.



So I go home and take the pills.

First night - I faint.



Oh boy, this is not looking good.



I don't sleep I just faint, over and over and over again.



Hmmmmm



Second night, I refuse to take it. I'm busy I don't dare take the pill and faint all over town



3 days later I start taking the pill at night.



It doesn't make me sleep, and it wakes up my appetite for the first time ever.



I'm hungry. So I go for a snack.

The next morning I wake up hungry. I've never done this. I go and have breakfast. This is a first!

Happy happy.



Now my taste buds seem to wake up and they want attention. They want flavor! They are driving me bonkers demanding flavors.

I've got me a huge food flavor craving. Is it the pills???? I don't know.



Now I start to eat, I find I am hungry all the time! I am having to work to eat enough to get the satiated sensation.

It's weird.



In the month since I started the Mirtazapine I've:



started to eat and really taste food;

started to cook!!!!;

started to look at recipe books and fancy making the dishes I'm seeing;

taken up eating breakfast;

and lunch;

and snacks throughout the day!



It's a miracle.



Then Tomi the stoma pipes up.



He farts, he gurgles, he cramps.

He poops, and poops and poops. I've never seen him so active.

He is shooting it out faster than I can shovel it in.



And then the appliances start to complain, and pull away from my stomach. I've never had this problem before

Tomi is tossing his cookies (bag peeling away from my skin and threatening to fall) all over town.



At long last my stomach is rounded all the way around instead of being flat on the right and then having this almighty

bulge on my left where Tomi lives. But the appliances are pulling away and the seal is breaking.



Tomi isn't playing nice!



I've never had this before. The slightest bit of activity - roll out pastry in the kitchen - and I can feel Tomi's appliance

peeling away.



Do you reckon this is due to the increased input and associated output??? Or do I have a bad batch of appliances?

Do you reckon this is because I've gotten more active and putting more stress on the appliance?



Or maybe Tomi's in shock and expressing his dismay at having to work harder by tossing his cookies?



It's gotten a little weird I don't mind telling you.



The Mirtazapine's done wonders for my appetite, my energy levels and my ability to complete multiple tasks

As for increasing my sleep- Nope. Not at all.



It turns out Mirtazapine is a magic bullet, just not in the way it was expected to be.

OOPs



Any words of wisdom would be gratefully received.



Is anyone else out there taking this pill and if so what has been your experience?

Thanks heaps

WOW, I think it is great that you have so many good things from this medication. Unfortunately the fact that you aren't sleeping as it was perscribed to do is another story. I would also dare to think that the increase in activity for both you and your stoma could very well be the reason you are having a time at keeping the pouch secure. You know you can call the manufactures and ask for some samples of their products to try out.

Meanwhile I hope you have told your doctor that the medication isn't any good for sleeping. When I eat a good full meal I sleep like a rock.

You are hilarious.  Wish I had some advice for you but at 30 pounds overweight and sleeping 9-10 hours per day, I fear I have none.  I just wanted to tell you that you made me laugh so hard and humor is the best advice for anyone in our various stages of Ostomy-itis.  

One piece of advice I can give you is this.  Right after my operation, I couldn't sleep for about a year.  I was prescribed Ambien. Boy, does it work.  Boy, is it addictive.  Getting off it was comparable to some of the stories I've heard about heroin withdrawal.  I never want to go through that again in this lifetime or the next. Whatever you do, don't get on that merry-go-round.  

I have found that for myself who can't take any kind of narcotics or heavy duty drugs at all, Sleepytime tea gives me that wonderfully woozy snuggly eight hours that works every single night.  Plus, it tastes good! 

Good luck to you!

Loretta