How to navigate dating red tape and avoid negative patterns?

Hey Zywie,

Yeah, stronger than ever :) Love of my life :)

Excellent response.

I am new here and this topic is dated, but I would like to respond. I have been an amputee for almost 40 years, I have been married three times and the amputations were never the problem. Once I had the ostomy, everything changed. My last husband left me when he knew the surgery was imminent. Since then, I have met a WONDERFUL man online and he was completely accepting of my ostomy AND my amputations. I fell head over heels and then blew it myself because I became "afraid" of his reaction in person. Stupid stupid me. I might have just blown a wonderful opportunity with an understanding man. Relationships are difficult at times with and without "disabilities" or scars. Our attitude about ourselves and our emotional "baggage" often poses the greatest obstacles.

You have to understand and accept that these twelve women were not who God wants you to be with. I look at it like this, I am so much more than my ileostomy bag. I have a brain that still works. I have arms that can hug and a heart that can love and be loved. My disability does not define my personality. I can still laugh and cry. I can be happy and sad. I accept me and the cards I was dealt in this life. I gotta play them where they were laid. I trust God totally and no matter what is thrown at me, I strive to overcome. I've had so much bad luck these last three years. Countless surgeries, two that were dire emergencies where I almost died. It was by God's grace that I am still here. My 33-year-old son passed away on the 17th of December 2018. I had to make the decision to turn off his life support. I left my abusive spouse of 13 years in June of last year after praying and waiting for God's guidance for 5 years. Nothing is on my timeline, it's all on His and when I followed His guidance, I was blessed with a nice apartment with a garage and a nice part-time job that I love. I retired in April of 2017 so I can't work over $17,000 a year until I turn 68 which is a ways away. That one special person is out there for you. I feel if a person is going to judge you on the fact that you have a medical issue or appliance, they aren't worth your time, so don't give it to them!! Keep your spirits up and stay busy. Trust God to lead you to your life mate. I fully believe you will find an amazing, loving, accepting person who will be more than happy to be by your side and grow old with you. I will keep you in prayer and ask God to bless you in ways that will astound you!! Good luck to you!! Most sincerely, Pamela.