Ostomate2 first logged onto the site on the 22nd of June 2010 (damn I’m good). One of the first things she did was leave a comment on my blog basically saying hi and she noticed I was from the UK and we had a lot of similar things in common. By the time I got to speak to her, CrazyLady had basically told her I'm an axe murderer, but luckily for me, Ostomate2 saw her for what she was (mostly because she completely freaked her out within minutes of meeting her by trying to get her to marry her 30-year-old son and offering to pay for her medical treatment!!!). We chatted a few times over the next few months and we added each other on Facebook. Then one day in November, she told me that there was an ostomy conference in Worthing on the 20th of November and she might be going. Up to that point, I hadn’t been to any ostomy events and there wasn’t any information on events in my area. Those of you who have kept up to date with my story will know I haven’t been very well, so a nice little holiday in Worthing and a chance to meet a few other people with ostomies as well as a chance to meet Ostomate2. So I rushed off to the travel agents and booked a train and a hotel. The day before I’m due to leave, she messages me and tells me she got the date wrong; the conference was actually on the 10th of December (a mistake anybody could have made). Luckily, they were able to change the date for a small charge of £15 (thieving bastards!!!).
So I arrived in Worthing on the 9th. The journey was uneventful apart from not being able to find a lift on the London Underground. I was hoping to meet Ostomate2 at the train station, but that didn’t happen, so I went to the hotel. (I should say at this point Ostomate2 hasn't been having the best time lately, so she should be forgiven for not being the most reliable person at the moment.) I quickly discovered that there aren’t very many young people in Worthing. The average age of the people in the hotel was about 60. At this point, I texted Ostomate2 to let her know I had arrived and see if she wanted to meet up before I went to bed. Unsurprisingly (but understandably), I didn’t get a reply that night, so I decided on an early night (didn’t have much choice since I didn’t know where I was). The next morning I woke up and had some breakfast. I was a bit disappointed that I hadn’t heard from Ostomate2, but then I remembered the main reason I was there, which was to meet some new people at the conference and hopefully find some solutions to my problems. I called for a taxi to take me to the venue and as I looked at my phone, I got a text saying she would see me there.
So I made my way there. What I was expecting was a big room with stalls and people modeling clothes and maybe some kind of a floor show or somebody giving a speech. Similar to what I’ve seen when I’ve been to careers fairs. I also imagined that people of all ages and from all over the country would be there and there would be doctors who could answer my questions and give me some help. That could not have been further from the truth. There was a room and stalls with people displaying things, but it wasn’t a very big room and there wasn’t very much of interest on offer apart from some free samples and these weird pants with a pocket for the bag (why?). I let Ostomate2 know that I had arrived and she texted me to let me know she would be about 15 minutes late. So I took the opportunity to have a good look around and hopefully find someone else my age. Unfortunately, the people at the conference were old enough to be the people at the hotel’s parents. When Ostomate2 arrived, she had her mum with her as backup (I am not an axe murderer!). After we had another good look around, we sat down and had a little chat and sampled the buffet (snack tray). I have to say, although Ostomate2’s mum is a very nice lady and I did enjoy our chat, it would have been nice if I could have spent a bit more time talking to the person who I’ve come all this way to see. Although an opportunity did present itself when I was invited to her house for lunch before I leave. Unfortunately, the offer was later retracted due to a scheduling issue (the thought was nice though). After our chat, they were kind enough to drop me off at the hotel before heading home.
That evening I decided to go and see a pantomime, Aladdin, which was nice. Then I went to bed and overslept, so I missed breakfast. I decided to text Ostomate2 one more time to let her know I was going. I was hoping she might want to see me before I left, but it wasn’t to be. So I took the train home.
All things considered, the meeting itself went well, but I would be lying if I didn’t say that the trip was a bit of a disappointment. The conference wasn’t all I had expected it to be; it wasn’t even that much of a break because it was way too short. I would have liked to have seen more of Ostomate2, but through no fault of hers, that didn’t happen. Another slightly disappointing thing, which I later found out, was that there was an ostomy conference in Wigan a few days later, so I made the journey for nothing (Damn!!!). Looking back, it was mostly my fault things didn’t go as well as I thought. If I could have done it again, I would have taken my time in planning it. Maybe shopped around and got a better deal so that I could have spent more time there instead of rushing into it and spending my money on the first thing I saw.
Since then, we’ve kept in contact on Facebook, and hopefully, me and Ostomate1 will get the chance to have a more productive and more organized meeting with Ostomate2 at a later date. I would also like to wish Ostomate2 a speedy recovery and hope she is feeling a lot better by the time we meet again.
See my next blog to find out what happened with Ostomate3…
Why Join MeetAnOstoMate?
First off, this is a pretty cool site with 37,000 members who truly understand you.
It's not all about ostomy. We talk about everything.
Many come here for advice or to give advice, others have found good friends, and some have even found love. Most importantly, people here are honest and genuinely care.
🛑 Privacy is very important - we have many features that are only visible to members, ensuring a safe and secure environment for you to share and connect.
Create an account and you will be amazed by the warmth of this community.
My rule is we chat on the website for at least 5 hours over the space of at least a week, then I add them on Facebook. Then, after at least another 2 weeks (during which time I watch their Facebook account very carefully for signs that this might not be a real person), we talk about meeting. Also, when I meet someone, I don't tell them what precautions I'm going to make so they can't take steps to counter them if they turn out to be a bit dodgy. With Ostomate1, we had been chatting for about 3 months, and he was a regular person in the chatroom. With Ostomate2, I'd been chatting to her regularly and following her story on Facebook for 6 months. One thing I have to say was probably a bit dodgy was when Ostomate1 got into a car with me and a guy he just met. Luckily, I'm nice and Ostomate1 didn't come to any harm, but if I wasn't, anything could have happened.
Having said that, I must confess that with Ostomate3, I completely ignored everything I've just said to you, as you will see.
Learn about some basic diet and ostomy pouch routines that can help prevent them.
Interesting story, and I feel for you and I am sure I would be disappointed. It does not sound like you are deterred, go for it! They say "Third time is a charm."
Stories of Living Life to the Fullest from Ostomy Advocates I Hollister
