Am I alone?

Replies
12
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1501
townhouse107
Jul 09, 2016 9:22 pm

When I first had my surgery and had the home health care nurses come in (by the way, they were great), they told me lots of folks have had this surgery. Right now, I am in NC and do belong to an ostomy support group and have met a few folks, but really, I'm thinking this ostomy stuff is not that common. I will be moving to Fort Myers in October and was hoping to meet a few ostomates there, but have no clue how to do this. There is no support group in Fort Myers.

mild_mannered_super_hero
Jul 10, 2016 4:17 am

Hello and welcome to Meet an Ostomate. You can search for members in Ft Myers on the left-hand side of the main menu page "Travelers Search".

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Bill
Jul 10, 2016 8:03 am
Hello townhouse107.
If you look under search members - general search and fill in where you want to find people, it brings up a list of people in your area. Not many in my case but it is a useful aid to looking for ostomates in particular areas. Also you local stoma nurse may well know where the nearest group meets. I did not know that there was a fairly local group to me until I saw a small advertisement placed in my local chemist. They were organising a 'meet the manufacturers' day which was quite interesting.
Best wishes
Bill
pammer
Jul 13, 2016 12:18 am
Hello, I understand how you feel. There is no support group and only a few ostomates where I live. I feel very alone. I just want to make some friends. So I returned to this web site with hope. Pammer
sunasea
Jul 13, 2016 4:39 pm

I decided not to dwell on my condition and just live my life. I use this site every so often and the people are great. For me, I have found the more I focus on being an ostomate, the more I think about it, the more I am reminded. Just living and enjoying life, I found to be a better approach. Create your own reality, a positive reality, and just be yourself because we will always have this ostomy. Also, I found local American Cancer Societies have support groups that meet, so you might want to try that. Have a wonderful summer.

 

How to Manage Ostomy Leaks with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

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Bill
Jul 14, 2016 5:13 am
Hello sunasea. I do like your approach which is indeed useful if you can sustain it. However, sometimes, especially when things are going wrong or severe pain enters the equation, it is very difficult to focus on other things. It is then that having people to chat to who understand the problems is very useful and I find that a site like this is good to be able to vent, chat or simply listen to what others have to say about their situations. Once I've had my little dose of companionship, I don't feel I'm alone with the problems anymore and do as you suggest by simply getting on with life.
Best wishes
Bill
Bill
Jul 14, 2016 5:13 am
Hello Pammer. Thanks for posting and explaining that you feel alone with your condition. A more positive spin on there not being many ostomates where you live might be to look at it from a slightly different perspective. I think that we all live on the very small planet we have chosen to call 'Earth' and so I believe there are lots of people with stomas where I live. I cannot spend a lot of time going to visit them all in a physical sense but communications via the internet has opened up fantastic opportunities for keeping in touch with people who can help to alleviate the feeling of being physically alone. I hope that you can fill this void by keeping in touch with us all on this site and I sincerely hope that you can think of us as your cyber-friends.
Best wishes
Bill
pammer
Jul 15, 2016 4:41 pm

Hi Bill. Thank you for your email, and I definitely want to be cyber-friends with everyone on this website. I will just have to kick my butt into gear and come here more often. One of the reasons I stopped for a while is because every time I logged in there would be no one in the chat room. But I will keep trying. I hope we can chat soon. Pam.

Bill
Jul 15, 2016 8:38 pm
Hello Pammer. I do remember your posts from before and often wonder where people get to when they no longer post on here.
As for the chat room, I rarely find anyone in there when I try it so I tend to do my chatting on the forum and the blogs. Sometimes it becomes a bit disjointed when I don't get on here for a day or so, but generally speaking it flows quite well and gives me time to think about what I want to say rather than having to rush to type stuff that is often not so well thought through.
Hoping to hear a lot more from you.
Best wishes
bill
sunasea
Jul 16, 2016 4:47 pm

Hi Bill, thank you for the helpful insight. I hope townhouse107 gets connected with folks in her area; the support is important.

axxe
Jul 20, 2016 11:30 pm
I thought we are few
Past Member
Jul 30, 2016 1:03 pm
I'm sure we are
LadyHope
Aug 10, 2016 3:35 pm

Hi everyone, it is good to be back posting. I have been away from this site for a few months. Yes, there is an aloneness one feels after having ostomy surgery. Saying that, I found reaching out to groups both online and locally has helped bridge the change to permanent ostomate. Prior to surgery, I did not know anyone who had an ostomy. Home care nurses were great, but again, they were not living the dream. I attended a support group and today help organize it. I am public with my ostomy in private settings. The only thing I have to consider daily is where to empty my pouch when I am on the road for work. I continue to travel some and do the things I enjoyed prior to severe UC. I do share with people that my UC was triggered by eating a spoiled hamburger, uncooked, at a summer picnic. Today, I still have inflammatory issues but do my best to deal with it. UC...the gift that keeps on giving... anyway, I am grateful for these last 3 1/2 years. Without this surgery, I would have died, no question about it. My only advice to newbies is to be gentle with yourself. An ostomy is a significant learning curve and one that takes practice. I still can't change my wafer under 1/2 hour, but many of my friends are able to accomplish the task very quickly. So, I keep trying. Take care and keep posting. There are great people here on this site willing to help and to provide support. You are not alone. LH