Patience

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9
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936
ycats
Dec 10, 2016 1:01 am

I was new to the ostomy crowd as of September 25, 2016. I totally struggled with the patience part of having an ostomy. I was new, and still feel new, and I just had to give myself time to figure it out. The doctors and nurses, without ostomies, tried to help, and no one had the answer I was seeking. It turns out that all it takes is patience within oneself to come to terms with an ostomy. I struggled greatly with why, and how, and what next, and what do you mean? Nearly two months in, I have a grip... My first blowout occurred a week ago while I was sleeping... reached down to feel a nice warm pile of poo. Got cleaned up and went back to bed... I am now swimming and working out at the gym. I tried to avoid the hernia prospect so I am still skittish. Just want someone who feels lost and insecure that there is hope... you can do this... My reversal is tentatively scheduled for January... I'm very much looking forward to the change. However, it may not happen and so begins my new way of life.

Primeboy
Dec 10, 2016 6:08 am
Patience and a little sense of humor will go a long way in helping us adjust. I got through all this preparing for a reversal back in 2004. Fortunately, before the reversal I also sensed that I could manage even if a reversal were ruled out. I like you readiness for what may come. You'll be fine whatever happens.
PB
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arcboss
Dec 10, 2016 1:25 pm

Hi there, I do know how you feel. I had my iliostomy for over 12 months, then was able to have a reversal. Thank God, now I'm in a good space. Hope the same can happen to you. Cheers, Andy

DonBrown1943
Jan 01, 2017 2:35 am
My colostomy was done as an emergency to save my life about three weeks after a minor car accident in which my seatbelt destroyed a large part of my lower intestine. I went to the ER with extreme abdominal pain and was put to sleep. I woke up two months later with a wound cavity you could stick a football in and a brand new colostomy bag. The wound is almost healed but I am still trying to come to grips with my unexpected change of lifestyle at the age of 73. You are farther along than I am but I also expect a reversal in early 2017. Still struggling, but getting better.
CharK63
Jan 01, 2017 9:56 am

Oh my goodness, you are so right! I need to have patience in my recovery process as well. From the reversal and from the hernia repair. Time is the most important part of healing and the one thing we can't control.
It's so darn difficult because of feeling ignorant. We may become familiar with our bags, but all the stages of the process are still going to be new.
You are so lucky to have only had one blowout. I had leakages sometimes three times a day. What I call a blowout was exactly that—an exploding blowout coming from in front of me! It was so frightening!
I was only home a week, but I'd had the bag for over a month the first time, and I was alone and still weak. I'm not describing it, but I learned how to use a plastic bag and sit on the commode until it was over.
I feel myself getting squeamish again talking about poo, yet it's never far from my mind: when did I go last, did I take my stool softeners, am I getting backed up?
This is bad enough, but when I had the bag, I was constantly checking if I was wet and wanting to feel if it was in the right place and worried if it showed or if it smelled.
I'm trying to keep an open mind about the bag because I'm not done yet, and the more surgeries I have, the harder to stay bag-free because of scar tissue.
I am not going to lose my life over this. I'm also not telling anyone but here about my continuing problems because I'm not going to worry everyone.
I'd rather be expected to do too much than be treated like an invalid. My poor old mom is scared to death she will outlive me, then what will become of her...
Here again, I don't understand what they are talking about why I'm bleeding 6 months after surgery. They say there are sometimes tunnels that are slow to heal and have to drain. I hear the words, what does it mean? Is it going away on its own or what?
Face it: I'll still be a newbie until a good chunk of time passes symptom-free because it's all Greek to me, and they don't show their real feelings to us anyway. It's all theatre.

 

Staying Hydrated with an Ostomy with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

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CharK63
Jan 01, 2017 9:56 am

Happy New Year, everybody! When you write your resolutions, take the time to write down what you accomplished this year.

If all you can think of is that you are still alive, then that is major progress in my opinion, as opposed to being "not."

NotDeadYet
Jan 11, 2017 7:17 am
NotDeadYet
Jan 11, 2017 7:17 am

CharK63:
What you write about is normal. Everything you write about is normal. At least, to me it is... I understand you don't want to scare YCats, but once again we all see how important it is to write and 'talk' openly!

CharK63
Jan 11, 2017 8:18 am
To Not Dead Yet,
Love your alias and thanks for the support. I often fear I get on a rant and need to stop but at those times any kind of 'patience' is beyond me and once I get started I just cut loose! Then I feel better for it, lol. Just sorry to be boring.
CharK63
DonBrown1943
Jan 15, 2017 9:02 pm
My colostomy was done on October 3, 2016, but I didn't know about it until November 3 or thereabouts when they let me wake up so we could discuss options, then back to sleep! I finally got to come home early in December and the drugs wore off 3 days later. That's when my new life began. About a week later I experienced a major blowout that was also a major disaster. I was still to weak to care for myself, so my poor wife had to clean me up, change the sheets with me still in the bed, then install a new bag. Since my colostomy is so close to the surgery wound (the deep pit where my belly button used to be), leaks are frequent but are becoming less serious. The wound is almost healed and I am almost about to take over my own care completely. My wife is more confident about this than I am, but I do want to be independent, taking showers, shaving, getting dressed, emptying or changing my bag, and pushing myself to get stronger. I know I can but I am still a little nervous about it. Ycats, for you to be going swimming is something that is so intimidating to me that I can't even think about that. I haven't even gone back into the public yet! I respect you greatly!