Newly registered today, I am both glad to find people in similar situations and in awe of your courage and spirit at keep fighting on. Will be thinking of you Tiffanie in particular with prayers.
I'm a Brit, forced to live in the UK since my beloved husband died a few years ago. Up until then we had lived in about 14 countries (he was in aviation and spoke 9 languages to native level). But I only speak English. So came back home to UK very reluctantly. It is more like downtown Baghdad than the green and pleasant land I lived in before.
We were living in Geneva when it all kicked off. One Sunday evening killer pain down low, slightly to left, tried to slip off to bed unnoticed but hubby spotted me and we soon realized it was an emergency. Agonizing drive to Geneva University Hospital. They decided what I had was a ruptured pocket in part of a diverticularized large colon. Had to be removed very fast. Result is peritonitis, like if your appendix bursts. Woke up in between delirious nightmares in intensive care. They got most out and had 6 antibiotics and morphine for pain. And a colonoscopy. Stayed 15 days and nights.
Discharged even though bad infection in scar, no belt offered, poor hubby was beside himself, Taken on a new job only 6 weeks before all this. 4 days after being home he went out 'for pizza' and never returned. He had the genetic suicide gene, his aunt killed herself at 33. But nobody told me that until after he had died.
Back to UK-NHS (National Health Service) has been destroyed by government to make way for the new EU system. Little did they know we would escape before that. But still trying to cut the cord so the NHS is pretty much on its knees, lack of money medical staff and too many aging population.
I had 4 dates for the Hartmanns to be reversed sent to me by post. I turned up was being prepped each time, each time it was called off for lack of a doctor to do it and I was sent home. I pretty much gave up at that point. Was being treated for PTSD for hubby's death, and clinical depression.
Had a small bump come up to the left of the hernia about 5 years later, went to see a specialist (took 3 months), he kneaded my gut like it was bread dough. Next day a bump to the left the side of half a watermelon. I could not believe my eyes. I looked 7 months pregnant but only one side. They said that most hernias end up with a parastomal hernia, and research proves it true. The mesh they use is useless.
Keep trying to find a research group who will use the brand new discovery graphene, 1 atom thick, stronger than steel. Determined. Documentary online somewhere. That would hold in anything, but so little research into this subject as it is seen as "distasteful" about poo etc.
2 days ago woke up to another quarter of watermelon so now only one quarter is almost flat. Very hard to keep the pochette glued on as I can't really see the opening. Another disaster 2 of the antidepressants they put me on virtually doubled my weight. I did not notice, hate mirrors, lived on a farm in a small cottage miles away, no living friends. Pharmacy sent me repeat meds every month. Never noticed my size ballooning. Only went out for groceries.
Went through not eating, being told off as stoma would not work, had no interest in anything after losing my man. Then tried salads, again told off, had to have some carbs. Just no interest whatsoever in food from then until now. Yet still feel like Shamu with a watermelon on my tummy.
My conclusion after extensive research is that the mesh is essential, but what they use is not up to the job. 50% of mesh repairs fail. Very few attempts at correcting the parastomal hernia work, unless they are tiny. And muscles get lax with age. It's catch 22
Reason is unless stoma pulled through a certain stomach muscle at op, it won't hold. Yet that muscle is very weak in most women in particular.
My grown-up son says I must tackle this once and for all, so now we start again with the rounds of "specialists" to see what can be done, if anything.
Best option from research is a support belt. I tried that, with a hole cut for the colon pochette, (they could not get the hole in the right position so it never worked, and a support belt (twice) without a hole.
Stoma nurse pulled it so tight, that discharge could not get into bag and squished out all around - total chaos, clothes, hair even shoes. This happened TWICE. So I gave up on belts.
I think the only time a belt will help is if you don't have any openings in the abdomen, so if after the reversal of a stoma I would wear one, to lessen the risk of hernia and to support stoma. But that is the only time.
Going to ask the specialist this time if he will remove some of the intestines, even most of them, if it makes it easier. I barely eat now, relying upon Kefir probiotic homemade and supplements. Still don't lose weight. Even going to ask for weight loss surgery (Bariatric).
Now I am Shamu size, here they think it is because you are a lazy fat cough potato. I am in agony from something else and cannot even walk from the bedroom to the kitchen. How the heck am I supposed to walk and exercise ?
I am a natural redhead, Titian, and redheads generally, if natural, feel at least twice the pain of any other tissue type. Sounds stupid but fact. Most doctors don't even know. You can google it.
This is my final attempt to get this sorted out. If they can't or won't help I will take things into my own hands. My son is grown and does not need me anymore and I have had a good life compared to many.
Next stop a pain clinic- and assessment for surgery, but it will not be for weeks or months I am sure. Meanwhile we plod on.
Sorry for hogging the board but wanted to get it all out there so you see my position. Who knew a parastomal hernia could be so huge? I am wearing maternity clothes. THAT tells it all. Plus it is evil-much more gas at unexpected times, then liquid them constipation. I can't stand that for the rest of my life, it's no life at all. And that is what I will tell the surgeon. Honesty is the best policy. Besides, I am only a number to him.
Love to all from England. My thoughts and prayers are with you all.