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I'm going to add a picture to this. It was taken two years after I had ostomy surgery. I had permanent ileostomy surgery and total colectomy over 12 years ago. I posted it on Facebook showing folks that an ostomy is not obvious, even in a swimsuit depending on the swimsuit. I got off of disability and resumed work as a wound ostomy nurse twice. I frequently tell my patients about many famous people who have had ostomies. The late John Wayne, George Clooney, and Fred Astaire just to name a few. I'll bet you never knew.
I loved surprising nurses who had known me for up to 2 years but never had a clue that I had an ostomy (I usually display mine briefly during teaching moments). And you should have seen the relief in the patients' faces who had first-time ostomies and saw me briefly expose mine. Their whole posture relaxed.
I'm sure a lot of you assume that it was easier because I was a trained ostomy nurse. No human being is prepared for having an ostomy. I spent two years bedridden and the physicians despaired of my life. But at some point, I had to decide to get busy living or get busy dying. I chose to live. Sometimes I still cry, sometimes I have bad days that seem like they are worse than anyone else, whether they have an ostomy or not. But I read something in a book that helped me decide. "You go on, you just go on. There's nothing more to it and there's no trick to make it easier, you just go on. And what do you find on the other side when you just go on? Your life again, what else?" I hope this helps. I would be happy to provide any resources I can, just send me a message.