Adjusting to Life with an Ostomy Bag

Okay, I haven't posted in a few days, and I know you guys like my stories, so before my surgery, when I had to wipe my bum, if I even sensed I got some feces on my hand, I went into a tizzy and would commence to run for water to get it off my hands. Now, after 23 months, and having my bum just a foot from my head, when I rinse my bag off or wipe the bag, I get crap (even though only paste or water) on my hand. It's not a big deal, and I say out loud, "Oh, I crapped on myself." I just lather up and wash my hands and wonder what else is happening today. Another thing I've started doing in public restrooms when people are around is to say out loud, "I don't remember eating that," or I say, "Hey, that looked the same coming out as it did when I ate it."

Life is what you make it.
bikerboy greg

Thank you Greg, that made me smile on a bad day xx

I see bumper stickers saying "Shit Happens!"... I say sure does!!!!!! And that's good LMPO

Bikerboy - I like your style
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Rach - Hope today is a better day for you - hugs.

Beatrice

Hahaha, nice bikerboy

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How to Manage Ostomy Leaks with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

yes Bikerboy, keep (always) a sense of humor; I used to freak when my pouch lost a seal, and now after a few years it is just another few minutes to a fix, then move on. Funny how we all adapt!  lex

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Yep, after 6 years I am used to it. I do often wonder what the person next to me in the public restroom thinks when he hears the water splashing in the stool when I am dumping it, or if they wonder why I am filling up a disposable cup with water and taking it into the stall and coming out with it empty. Just a part of the life we lead, I suppose.

Thanks Beatrice, needed those hugs, having the day from hell ..... could be worse though, bag could have come off as well, that would do it for me today ... xxx

Me too!  I often think the person in the next stall must think there's a horse taking a leak in there, but what are you going to do? I do like those "automatic flush" public loos; they kind of make us all sound the same then!
Cheers!  

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I sometimes say, when I am in the staff canteen, "That looks like the contents of my bag." Somehow, it puts people off. Don't know why?

Maybe it's because some people have a shitty sense of humor; as long as you can get a laugh out of it, you've won.

I like to expose the bag and give it a gentle squish when asked if I would 'like dessert?' at any number of restaurants in Chinatown, usually complemented with a quick 'Let's see, eh?' Nets me a couple of days of giggling
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You guys are hysterical! Also, who besides me thinks Bikerboy Greg should be nominated to replace George Carlin (same witty style) with a little extra - first stand-up comedian with an ostomy - if anyone can do it at open-mike at the Comedy Store - you can, Greg!

You guys make me think of that scene in Austin Powers where he's wrestling with the bad guy in the stall and then flushes him - "Good God, boy - what did you eat!!!!!!"
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It put people off because what you said is not funny - at all! I certainly would not have been happy to be there and hear it! I've had my ostomy for years and I do have a good sense of humor, but could not even smile at your crass comment.

My post above was to Skyblue