Ostomy smell

OSTOMY SMELL:



I’ve talked before about the sex

And how some questions make me vexed.

Yet still some can’t keep their mouth’s shut

And question me about my butt.



It’s when they ask about the smell.

I feel resentment in me swell.

My favourite way to deal with it.

Is pointing out “It’s not just shit!”



“I think the worst smell that I know

Comes from other folk’s B.O.”

I follow up with “What the hell!

It’s only just another smell.”



I’ll tell them “Ostomies are clean

Much more so than my bum has been.”

Then with a great impertinence

I’ll talk about incontinence.



Once this conversation starts

I will comment on ‘their’ farts

And I will use that age-old line

That their shit stinks, just like mine.



There is a difference with us

Because we do not make a fuss.

It’s all contained within a bag

And filters mean the smell won’t lag.



I carry round deodorant spray

So any smells are kept at bay.

Unlike many other folk

Who stink, but think that it’s a joke.



I do not get into a state.

I just give it to them straight.

There’s nothing smelly about me

Certainly not my ostomy.



B. Withers 2012

That's fantastic, Bill. Well written and true to the end. Couldn't have said it better myself. Thank you for sharing it with us. Take care, Ambies.

Hello Ambies,Thanks again for your supportive comments. I do recognise that there is a very limited audience who 'might' appreciate this type of rhyming verse. In a way, the writing of it is like talking to myself. (A sort of madness?) There is no one to listen and it would be embarrassing if there was. However,when people reply in the way that you do, it engenders those warm, comfortable feelings of companionship that come from shared experiences. It's like being in an exclusive club where membership is restricted to only those who have had the experiences. I don't usually look forward to Christmas but this year I'm eagerly awaiting your poem on the subject. I've written loads over the years and they are nearly all negative so this year I'm determined just to read rather than write. Best wishes Bill

Kudos. This had me lmao. Yeah, I have been around people whose B.O was worse than anything the pouch can offer. Then some seem to have a problem with holding in their deadly WMDs while standing in line at the grocery store or Walmart. If you can't hold it in, run to the bathroom and let her rip. Don't be releasing that deadly gas from your ass while standing in front of me, please. I admit when I was young and had my insides intact, I would love to let my friends have the pleasure of enjoying my floral bouquet, but that was my friends and family. But now, those days are over, and even when my lil stoma does say hello, it is not as bad as what it could be coming from the missing half of my little friend!