Try saying that title 3x fast... what a mouthful!
I had my first colonoscopy since getting stomas today. I learned a lot.
1) If you use closed-end bags, you'll want a drainable bag for the prep. I knew this and planned ahead. BUT I underestimated the difficulties of using an unfamiliar bag.
It had a cool little pocket to secure the outlet, so I used it. But then the bag filled very quickly. I struggled to get the outlet out of its pocket. Then I struggled to open the outlet. Either by accident or by design, there appeared to be an extra Velcro dot holding the bag closed (in addition to the main Velcro strip). All the while, the bag is overfilling. I finally get the Velcro detached, and the whole thing slips out of my hands. Massive mess. 🤦♀️
So lesson learned, don't use that cute pocket.
Next time, I'm prepared. I'm still struggling with that extra Velcro dot, but I'm faster and able to control the outlet. But I'm standing. Not as messy as last time, but still. 🤦♀️
So next time I try sitting; this was how I was taught originally. I'm tall, and my stoma is placed very high (about 2-3 inches above my bellybutton). The outlet barely reaches the top of my leg. I look at this situation and realize immediately that this won't work. If I try, it will be all over me for sure.
Back-up plan: I grab a large cup. I need 2 hands to open the pouch, so I try to find a surface to put the cup on. The toilet seat is too low. The top of the sink looks promising, but I'm worried it's too high. I settle on the back of the toilet (water tank). This works better, but I still get some rogue splashing. 🤦♀️
Next time, I undo all the damn Velcro and hold it closed with 1 hand while holding the cup with the other hand. I can't control the unrolling, but I can position the cup so the outlet is at the bottom of the cup and prevent splashes from getting out. It makes a mess of the bottom of the bag, but I wipe it with Clorox wipes and call it good.
Whew! One half of my prep done. But at least I have a workable procedure for part 2.
Final lesson: develop a procedure for an unfamiliar bag BEFORE the day of prep. In retrospect, I was an idiot not to anticipate a problem with a bag I had never used before.
2) (Yep, all those words were really just 1 lesson)
Bring a spare bag to the procedure. Fortunately, I always have a couple of spares with me, so no problem.
Also, I use Coloplast bags, which have a locking mechanism. When they did the procedure to examine my urostomy for leaks, the interventional radiologist did not know how to take off the bag and ended up compromising my wafer. I expect my colorectal surgeon would know better, but I took no chances and unlocked the bag before they took me back.
3) The colonoscopy through the stoma was fine. No residual discomfort other than all the gas (just like before the stoma).
4) I have a rectal stump, so he also examined that. I ended up with some soreness and a little bleeding from that. Bring a pad next time just in case. Soreness is fading already, and it's only been a few hours, so no big deal.
Results:
He removed 2 large polyps (I could swear he said 4-6 cm, but that can't possibly be right, so who knows? He definitely described them as large.) He believes they are precancerous and not cancerous yet, but we'll need pathology to know for sure. (Nail-biting time!)
Staples have come undone in my rectal stump. He said he could see through to the mesh placed by the urologist during the surgery. Yikes! All he said was we need to keep the drain (I have a drain placed in my pelvis since last Aug/Sep). But afterwards, I had a dozen questions that I hadn't asked. I have a follow-up next week, so I'll ask then.
Hopefully, this helps someone else know what to expect and prepare better or at least provides some amusement. Now that I'm safely back in my familiar closed-end bags, the whole bag episode seems funny to me. And who else would appreciate the humor?
