Dealing with 2 Ostomies - Seeking Advice and Support

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tselio71
Nov 04, 2013 12:10 am

About 5 years ago, I had stage 3B cervical cancer. It was too late for any female surgeries to be done, so I did the chemo and radiation. About a year after the treatment, my body decided to fall apart. First, I had the colostomy, and then 6 months later, I had my urostomy done. About 4 months after the surgeries, I was going to an ostomy support group. It helped me a great deal to get a handle on all the emotions of dealing with 2 surgeries and going through cancer. My questions are: Is there anyone else on here who has 2 ostomies? How did you get through it? And if single, how do you go about telling them about all of this? Thank you in advance for the input, and sorry for any spelling errors.

Bill
Nov 04, 2013 8:13 am
Hello tselio71.  You have obviously been through a great deal and have worked through much of the emotional stuff, which is probably where a lot of the stresses are. I haven't got two ostomies but I work with several people who have. Some of them find the emotional side more difficult than the physical but there are a  few that cannot deal with the physical side for themselves and need someone else to help. They tell me that there is an extra stress and embarassment involved in having to allow someone else to clean up for them and they are reluctant to ask for such help.  I always feel humbled and appreciative when people will share their feelings about these types of things as it indicates that they have confidence that I will not be put off either by the conversation or by helping them practically in such situations.  Of course everybody is different in the way that they handle these things but I find that giving off an air of calm confidence can encourage others to deal with adverse circumstances more effectively than if they become entangled in their own  emotions. Sharing with the 'right' people can be most beneficial. However, sharing with people who do not know how to cope simply adds to the problems you already have.  The skill maybe about finding out about other peoples' personality and capabilities before sharing with them.

Best wishes  

Bill
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tselio71
Nov 04, 2013 5:52 pm

Thank you, Bill. When this all started 5 years ago, I was 37 years old. Being a female at that age with no kids and going through what I did, there is still no chance for me to have kids. That in itself was very hard to overcome. If it wasn't for the ostomy group I had gone to a few times, I would still be very lost and hard to deal with.

Virgo
Nov 07, 2013 5:16 am

You are one very brave, strong lady.....GOD BLESS

carebear422001
Nov 11, 2013 7:05 am
tselio71,

I haven't had to deal with cancer, but I have a whole host of other medical problems to deal with daily. I have three ostomies that I have to deal with. I have an ileostomy, an ostomy where the doctors tried to insert a j-tube but they didn't make the tract long enough, so they pulled the tube out, but it made a fistula that drains, and I have to wear an ostomy bag over it to catch the drainage. The third one is where I had a 28 French j-tube in the middle of my stomach for feeding, but the doctors took the tube out last week, and the hole is the size of a quarter that drains my saliva and stomach contents, so I have to wear an ostomy bag over it as well.

When I was 18, I had a daughter that was born with a birth defect called spina bifida. She lived to be 12 years old and died in 1999, and I don't have any more children. I just thought I would share my story with you and let you know that you aren't alone dealing with having multiple ostomies. You are a strong lady to endure all that you have gone through.

Take care
carebear422001
 

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Bill
Nov 11, 2013 8:47 am
Hello Tina.  Thank you for sharing your story with us. There is not a lot I can say except that I'm sure we can all empathise with your situation. It's bad enough dealing with one bag let alone two or three! I hope things start to improve for you soon.

Best wishes  

Bill
tselio71
Dec 05, 2013 6:54 pm

Thank you for sharing your story. It makes me feel better when I hear that there is someone else out there that has multiple ostomies.