Nervous about upcoming colostomy - seeking support

My colostomy is due to take place fairly soon and I have my pre-op assessment at the hospital tomorrow. In the meantime, the stoma nurse has given me a fake stick-on stoma and a few bags to practice with, the first one which I put on yesterday. It was comfortable and I forgot it was there except when I went to the toilet as it got in the way a bit, but when I took it off today it was hard because I have some loose skin on my tummy and was afraid my skin would rip! It has left a pink mark on my skin, but maybe this is normal at first? That was about an hour ago and I just looked and my skin looks fine now. I do have some Apeel spray but didn't have to use it. The loose skin was left after I lost 5 stones (70 lbs) last year due to following my diabetes diet of very low carbs and now my diabetes is in remission.

I've had lots of stomach surgery so I don't know why I am feeling so nervous about having the colostomy done. I'm even jittery about the assessment! I've been housebound since emergency surgery a year ago due to part of my bowel dying and being removed, which caused D and useless sphincter muscles (not a good combination)!

Maybe I just wanted to share with people who understand as no one can change the situation, and it's not something that you can talk to just anyone about.

Thanks for 'listening'.

Hugs, Beshlie

Hi Beshlie, you came to the right place to ask questions and learn about ostomies - welcome. Practicing with the bag is good. I also practiced about one week before my surgery so I had an idea what it was like. The sticky wafer tends to leave a temporary pinkish/red mark on my skin after I remove it. Then it fades away. You may want to use some lukewarm/cool water on the wafer while slowly peeling it off. The skin on the stomach is very fragile unlike our elbows or knees, for example.

I agree with you about talking about bowel issues with the general public. It is not something most people want to discuss. My family never asks me how I am doing/managing. They do not want to discuss any of it. If I happen to bring it up, I get the "look". Thankfully, here on this site, we discuss it all and freely.

It sounds like your surgery will give you your freedom back. My friend had a similar surgery as yours due to cancer and struggles with controlling his BMs. My UC ran my life in the end. I had to be near a bathroom because I never knew when the urge would come. Take care Beshlie and keep posting. You will find many friends on this site. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Sincerely, LH

Hi Beshlie, just writing to wish you well for tomorrow and what lies beyond it. I take it you are having all this at Derriford? They looked after me for nearly 7 years, and I always thought their stoma nurses were great. I can't say I have fond memories exactly, but they helped me a lot there!

Do stick around, and tell us how you get on! Chris

Hi Beshlie,

Welcome to the forum! You got a fake stoma to use to practice with the bags. WOW, I didn't know such things were even available!

Yes, it is normal to have pink skin when you take it off, but like LadyHope said, it goes away fairly quickly. It is best to push down on your skin when you're taking the appliance off once you get it started. You will still have pink skin but you shouldn't tear any skin. Did you fill the bag halfway with any mashed potatoes or jello or anything so you could get the feel of weight you will be carrying?

So the day is over, hope things went as well as they could have for you.

You know, most folks don't like to talk about anything that they don't understand. Sometimes we can find one or two who are interested in what a stoma is and what it is like to have one. Then again, I don't like to tell all the details either, it is a bit personal.

Hope to hear more from you, take care and don't be a stranger!

Thank you all. My skin recovered fine. I guess it needs to toughen up a bit!

Yes, I will be going to Derriford, I only live about a mile from there. That is where I've had all of my stomach surgeries, some stays have been OK and a few, because I was there on a weekend seemed very short staffed and a couple of times I was left without pain relief, until one of the Navy nurses came to my rescue! I have met the stoma nurses and they are really nice.

I haven't yet put anything in the bag with my practice stoma as I'm waiting for some drainable bags to arrive, but I got the feel of wearing a bag and I forgot it was there.

My pre-op assessment went great. My heartbeat is a bit slow but it's beating normally, but I've had this for a while. So it's just a matter of waiting for the date of my op now. On my notes, the consultant expects me to be in the hospital up to 4 days. All the tricky stuff was done a year ago (removing bowel) so it's just a matter of forming a stoma. And I have carers in place for my return home at my husband's house where I will stay for the first 3 months.

It's weird because some of my 'so-called' friends have disappeared since knowing the kind of surgery I'm having. One said to me, 'people stink after having that done!'. How ignorant and ill-informed. That is one 'friend' I will not miss! I am the type of person who can talk on any subject, I think it breaks down barriers.

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Thank you for the update. You are lucky not needing to have to park there, and those Navy nurses are great!

I was stuck in A&E one Saturday night when problems broke out - instead of calling security, one of the Navy nurses came out, went into the waiting area, and said something that I think translates roughly as 'now ladies and gentlemen, we aren't going to have any problems now, are we?' in a voice that could probably kill at 50 yards, and the miscreants slunk away like naughty five-year-olds! Epic!

I'm sorry about the disappearing friends - I think we've all had them! I hope you get your op date soon. Do keep coming here - you will have lots of questions as things settle down.

Chris