All right, so here's my 2 cents.
I've had an ostomy since I was 15 - now 35. Rectum remaining for potential reconnect. Decided reconnect had more risks involved than rectum removal, and life with ostomy has been very good.
Went into the surgery here very healthy overall. Leaned out a little prior to, under the advice of the surgeon's office that I would heal faster in general with less body fat. I'm not a big guy to begin with, but I dropped 10 lbs prior to surgery, and then post of lost another 15-20 lbs. D'oh! Looked like a bag of bones walking around. I did not have an extra 20 lbs to lose, but here we are. Looking back, I think I would have tried to fatten up prior to instead! Guess it's a safe bet you'll lose weight when they physically remove part of your body and then you don't eat for 2 weeks.
April 20, 2018, had rectal stump (8") and anus removed. Had to zipper me open, as they attempted to go in laparoscopically but encountered a ton of scar tissue, taking on an extra 3 hours to operate. Resulted in a bit of swelling shifting of stuff around ostomy, but now 4 weeks post-operation, the abdominal incision is healed solid, and could probably resume using full-size skin barrier as I had prior (meaning a portion covers the incision on my tummy) without any concern, and most swelling and skin shifting around ostomy has returned back to normal.
I wasn't blessed with a well-behaved digestive system in general, and that behavior didn't change when it came to this operation. Tried to start eating and drinking as soon as I got the green light, but it took my guts a good 8 or 9 days to wake up. Apparently, they go to sleep while in an operation such as this and most don't have this issue. Did everything I could that was suggested, sugar-free gum, drinking water, aloe vera gel, but my guys were simply on their own time frame. This linked directly to my appetite, to which I'm happy to report is pretty well back now, but it was quite disheartening not wanting to have anything to do with food. Just another factor I wasn't anticipating. I love food. I really do. For me, my appetite came back ever so gradually, but it did come back.
Other bodily functions seem to be returning slowly as well. Peeing after surgery was a near nightmare. Once they pulled out the catheter, it took me a while to 'remember' how to pee, they were threatening to put in a catheter to break the seal so to speak, while I was conscious!!!!!!!! So I sat on the can, put my hand under warm running water and thought real hard, like more than I ever have about how to pee, waterfalls, swift moving rivers, garden hoses, running water in general, and magically it worked. I cried in relief I wasn't getting re-cathetered. Sexual function seems to be working fine, but as expected with all the muscles involved down there, things feel a bit different, but progressively feeling more and more back to normal. Similar with peeing, as magical as that first pee was, felt super weird throughout my abdomen and pelvis at first, and is now near normal.
So that was the good part. Man, my butt is a pain...in...the butt. I saw an earlier post on here somewhere that said someone requested their surgeon keep the patient's anus intact. Well, shit, I didn't know that was an option! So they took the whole package out, rectum, anus, and then put in 8 stitches (that I can see). They tell me they dissolve. I must have gotten the long-lasting delayed dissolve stitches or something, as they're still there. Love them. Said nobody ever. Pretty tender at times.
So far, I've been trying to manage this discomfort - no drugs other than the odd Tylenol, so really given that, it's not that bad. But showering twice a day to ensure cleanliness, using my superhero wife's hair blow dryer to blow dry the old poop shoot till it's bone dry, and I've been a bit concerned about a small infection on one of the suture sites so Polysporin to boot. Also, I've been trying to do 1 or 2 Epsom salt baths for 20 mins a day to give it a good soak, GP and nurses suggested it's a good way to help with infection, cleaning, and odor, details spared on that one - holy! Yeah.
Sleeping kinda sucks still, ironically got better last week as I went out got me a case of laryngitis along with a chest cold, so as much as it sucked coughing, sneezing, and not being able to speak, taking NyQuil before bed helped me sleep. But now I'm not sick, so I don't take NyQuil, so I don't sleep. Butt stitches I find are just annoying. I'll get a couple of hours of rest in, but then it starts to tingle, itch, or burn. Shower helps, it's just weird at 2 am. Frustrating to be honest. At least there's Netflix.
Read a few posts about stuffing some gauze up there to help keep it dry and clean, been doing that for the last few days for small chunks of time. Seems to help keep it more dry and clean as it still weeps a bit.
What else...
I live a pretty physical lifestyle, so it's tough. Surgeon follow-up is in 1 week, probably not gonna be cleared for light duties yet, but work is supportive so I'm not rushing that side, but 2 kids that I want to play with is probably the toughest part. For any of you who stumbled onto this and managed to keep reading through my rambling, and also just got their ostomy... (disclaimer - everyone is different) if you want to continue your once active lifestyle, it's 100% up to you. Attitude is a big part of this. I'm having to listen to my own words here, but you will get back to where you were. To be honest, my greatest accomplishments in life by far have come with a pouch. (Granted I was 15 when I got it, but I'm making a point). If you're having issues with leaking, failures, etc., sit down with a stoma nurse - they have lots of info, and often lots of free samples to try different pouches. Be open.
Anyways, so here we are so far so good, hoping to get back on my bike in the future, making that my goal. I don't even really like riding my bike that much, but at this point, it seems like the most difficult goal to achieve, so pitter patter. I'll check back in once I'm back on the hill. In the meantime, happy to answer questions, provide insight or advice for any folks out there adjusting to life with an ostomy.