Silver Linings

1. No more clogged toilets.


2. My toilet paper budget has gone WAY down!


3. Always a conversation starter. (No, I've never been too shy to say ANYTHING!)


4. I actually brighten a lot of people's day when they are down and feel like nothing can top their bad day.


5. I have enough medical expenses to itemize on my taxes.


6. I can get away with rude noises.


7. My kids have learned never to take good health for granted, and to take care of their bodies.


And best of all:


8. I have found the most awesome bunch of guys and gals in the same situation to share with - give yourselves a hand, fellow ostomates!!

Dana, that was a totally awesome list; you brightened my day.

And mine as well
Well done,
I love coming out of a disabled loo and smiling at everybody.

Mine too!
I love to tell people (friends that know how I was) how much easier it is to 'plug' the hole from the front instead of plugging from below.
Best wishes
Bill

You forgot one real gem of a silver lining... Never having to sit down (if you don't want to) on a toilet that has God knows what growing and fermenting on the shitty seat. Yipee!!!

How to Manage Ostomy Leaks with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

Never been happier... odd, right?! Yes, having an ostomy is inconvenient. Yes, there's a big learning curve to managing an ostomy. (I've been covered with poo due to ostomy operator error, but I learned from my mistakes.) Once you find the right products and learn your body's rhythms, living with an ostomy is no big deal. I run, bike, swim, surf, etc. The thing I like the least is emptying my bag... ick. So, I use the ColoMajic biodegradable bag liners. (Pull out the liner and flush) Seriously, you can live a normal, happy, healthy, active life. There is hope!

Just had to reply to the "poo all over you." Before I got the BCIR, my pouch came open during sex. I cried for a while. Hubby came in after a shower, comforted me, told me it just might happen again, but was not a problem to him. He totally understood and was not "turned off." I have never told this to anyone before now.

Now we can share "poo all over me" stories, and not from the adored baby whose diaper leaked. The worst one was on a joyous, bright, sunny day, swimming in the Dead Sea in Israel. I got in the water up to my knees, and plop... fell in. I was quite overweight and couldn't get up. I felt like a beached whale, but then I found out so did all the skinny people. After lathering ourselves in that healing mud and washing it off, I went to the changing room, pulled down my bathing suit, and found myself covered with (not mud) poo... all over. Oh my. I lived dangerously back then (and still do) and didn't have a change of appliance with me. I pulled my dirty suit back on, headed to the showers, grabbed some toilet paper along the way, showered it all off, plugged the hole, washed the pouch (no disposables back in the day), and went back to my changing locker (wrapped in a towel). I didn't have the glue to apply to the wafer or my skin, but I did have tape, and that sufficed. I have never been back to Israel, but if I did go back, I'd do it all again. Just be a little more prepared.

Hi Dana... had to share the Poo incident, but also wanted to tell you that I loved your list. Kudos to you, for coming out with the attitude that will see you through anything. My ostomy is my badge of survival... Best wishes.
Marsha

Hi, newbie. Great post. I have always been proud of my Rosie, as Marsha said she is my badge of courage and survival. My one and only poo story happened at a Cirque du Soleil performance. In my excitement in getting ready to go, I forgot to use my barrier paste. We went for an Italian meal before the show. Halfway through the show, I went to spend a penny and discovered everything oozing from beneath my base. I used miles of tissue and discovered I had not packed an extra base. It was awful. I cleaned as best I could and did have an extra pouch. I spent the remainder of the show in the back row, holding my hand over the pouch, hoping that would suffice. It did. Lesson: always have extra supplies. But hey, the world didn't end, I learned something. Ha. All good. Stay as positive as you are, rosiesmom.

As I read your comments and type this, I am enjoying a nice relaxing sit! I love to tell people when asked what I'm doing, that I'm having a sit. What are you doing?

That SO made me laugh!! Keep well guys!

Wonderful to read these stories. Makes me feel that I am not alone. I've had a few incidents over the last 3 years, but you just wipe down and get on with it. Still, I won't go to places like cinemas or theaters in case! How do I get over this lack of confidence?

Hi Justanne, you are not alone in this world. I've had my ileostomy since I was 15...that's over 50+ years ago. It gave me the freedom to get on with my life, to date, to marry, to have children, return to school, and do all the things I only dreamed about during the 4 years I was sick. "If you want it, it's no dream," I paraphrase a quote from a famous statesman. But it applies to us. You've been given a second chance at life...don't put barriers in your own way. Take chances, but be prepared. What is "the worst that could happen?" You have the skills to cope with anything. We've all had "accidents," ostomy or not...especially at "our" age. Bring supplies, buy a ticket, and go. Best regards, Marsha

Thanks, Marsha, you are right. I am fine with family, friends, and at work; it's just with strangers that I feel this insecurity. I will buy a ticket and go as you say, and maybe even enjoy it. Anne x

Wonderful examples of a Silver Lining with an ostomy!
I must agree the last one is the best. To know that there are many folks here on this forum with wonderfully compassionate, helpful hearts willing to take time from their days to give advice and cheer each other on is awesome!

Hi Anne,
Preparation is the key to confidence. I never ever thought I would feel the way I do now about my ostomy. My first trip out was to the CBeebies Kids Show on tour here in Newcastle with my granddaughter. I was so nervous and a bit stressed. Now I don't even think about this thing. It's only natural that you feel this way; we all have, but you will get there.

Hi Anne,

Glad to know that my comment, advice, or encouragement helped. Let us know the first movie you go to...

First steps are difficult to take, but the movies... that's an easy one as the bathrooms are usually readily available. I always go before the movie, or just after the previews, to let out air, or "empty" as need be.

I find it relatively easy to get through the 2 hours... but if I have unexpected heavy output, I just go out for a quick break. Even if you feel like all eyes are on you, the reality is that no one watches. Enjoy... and be sure to get back to us.

Anne, go for it! As a side effect of my whole hospitalization/ostomy surgery/massive antibiotic treatment of my peritonitis, I am relatively pain-free for the first time in over 2 years. I actually feel liberated - I am able to go to the movies, the library, the grocery store ... I have more freedom now than the last 2 years! Don't worry, you will very quickly settle down to a routine, and you will be very aware of when your new best buddy is normally active and when it is quiet. Plan your trips around the quiet times. And for peace of mind, pack a small case or bag with emergency supplies. Back when I wore contacts, I had received a small zippered pouch about 6" x 4" x 2" with a carrying strap designed to hold your contact case and solutions. It is the perfect size to hold 3 or 4 pouches, plastic bags for disposal, a couple of faceplates, wipes, scissors, and anything else needed to be able to change a pouch or faceplate in any kind of situation. It is totally discreet and I have it labeled with my address and phone number in case I lose it somewhere. I call it my "confidence bag".

I also found that wearing a skirt instead of pants is much more comfortable and tends to hide the presence of the bag. Unless you say something, most people are not even aware it is there.

Thank you for your words. I do take emergency supplies with me but sometimes if my stomach is upset the bag can burst. Enough said. Maybe I should keep spare leggings with me as well. As I said I'm ok at work and with people who know my story. What do you do if you have a windy day if you get my drift? It's something you can't control. That's why I dread situations where I am in close proximity to strangers. My doctor told me to buy a small dog which I have but can't take him to the cinema! Anne

I adore dogs but how does getting one help your situation? ?

As a dog owner, if there is a nasty smell I can always blame the dog!

Ha ha Chris P never thought of that! But mine's a urostomy. A lot less smelly. lol

The only 'blow-out' I've had during a church service, those who noticed anything all blamed the guy burning the incense for using a bad brew. 'It's only the usual stuff,' he protested, puzzled - but he used a new box for the next service, everything was OK, so they must have been right.

Lol brilliant!

Hi Ann,

It's 5 am, and "Nature called," and I decided to stop by the computer. So much "action." Hi "guys & gals"!

This is for Ann, and anyone else who has those "noisy or windy" concerns. People fart! That's life.

I grew up traveling on the trains...Brooklyn to Manhattan for college. Believe me, more people passed wind than you can imagine. Ours however, is "in the bag," so it's not going to smell.

However, the pouch may fill up with air during the movie. Sigh. That's nature at work. When I'm alone (and yes, I do go to the movies alone at times) and not sitting next to anyone, I will reach under my clothes and release the air. I think I'm the only one that smells it...but if someone gets a whiff...Oh well. They don't know where it's coming from.

I've also done this, if I'm alone in my car, but I definitely open the windows. I never did this in the earlier years...but after 50 years...I'm chalking it up to laziness & "old age." I've gone on long drives with friends, when the "wind" issue happens to occur, and if I'm uncomfortable with the air in the pouch, and I'm not near a restroom, we stop the car...I get out, release the air, and get back on the road. The birds and bees don't care.

But I'm civilized enough NOT to do it at a dinner table at a restaurant. In that case, I go to the restroom. Relax Ann, As someone else said, be prepared (I'm not) for the worst (with supplies) and just go and relax, and enjoy.

As for a real "blow out" as Chris described, it happened to me at the theater...about 1/2 hour from home. I didn't want to leave in the middle, so I went to the bathroom, did a clean up in the stall (messy!) and then taped the dirty used wafer back onto my skin, and packed toilet paper around it. (I always carry tape with me) We went home when the play was over. In 50 years...it's happened once. Best of luck to all...

I now feel a hell of a lot better having heard your stories. I'm going to grandkids school show tomorrow night so determined to relax and enjoy. My operation saved my life so I better get on with it and stop worrying. Thank you all. Anne xx

These are such great shares about life with an ostomy. Thanks for the confidence boost. LH

Great post Dana!!

Hi Anne, happy to hear you are going to the grandchildren's school. Hope you have a great time. As your confidence grows, you will hopefully venture farther afield. I have been able to go to Europe with the family and a road trip from Florida to North Carolina. It just takes planning and making sure you pack plenty of supplies and slightly adjusting your diet to be more pouch-friendly. Keep the spirit, and you will be fine. Sincerely, Rosiesmom.