Intimacy - Advice for Gay Men with Ostomies

Hi everyone,

I would like to know any advice as a gay man with an ostomy having sex. I'm too shy to ask my doctor and would like some advice. I am a 33-year-old male bottom.

To properly answer your question, more information is required.

What type of ostomy do you or your partner have? Ileostomy or colostomy.

If your partner has the ostomy, then it's really a matter of securing the bag with a belt. A long bag like a Hollister can be folded up and secured with two small paper binder clips (IGGIE clips) on each side of the bag flange.

If the bottom person has the ostomy, then consultation with a colorectal surgeon would be recommended. In many cases, only a closed-off, small rectal stump remains after ostomy surgery.

Even though you might be embarrassed, talking with a medical professional is a step you should seriously consider.

 

 

 

 

Hi Will, I have an ileostomy and make sure my bag is empty, fold it in half, and then keep it secure with some really nice panties that have strategic cutouts. You'd have to take care not to press your bag into the bed too much if facing that way, or to make sure your partner isn't pressing his belly against yours too much if you're facing up. The rest is just figuring out things along the way!

Just do what you normally do, but don't use the Stoma. Regards, IGGIE.

As Iggy described, do not mess around with a stoma. Or back to the ER you shall go.

Getting Support in the Ostomy Community with LeeAnne Hayden | Hollister

Hi, I found some really cute lace ostomy belts.